the now me

hey bloggers its a very long time ive never post anything here. i really feel guilty now bcs so much wasted one thousand moments just past without blogged. the last post was in 2013, now its 2016. damn its 3 years passed without blogged. well, i dont know where will i begin. hmm about my relationship, im still with FF, firstly im not sure this relationship will be gettin old as now, it hv been 4 years, i run this dating, i mean, we run this dating. im not boring at all, its fun, it makes me be an adult before the time idk bcs pressures that ive got during this relationship or he teaches me to be, but im happy to be as me now. and you know? i dont lose my virginity like common old couples. im still a girl. he really protects me by prevents it happen. we just spent our time together with some positive talks and acts such doing tasks together, went to places that we haven't go there, learnt fun new things together and spoke it, worked real job that we've never imagine that we did it :') (bread seller, private teacher), together..
about college, ive graduated bloggers :'). i go to jakarta to have a better life in work and exactly have a new challenge in my relationship with him in a looooooooooong distance relationship, is that be worst? not really! you know bloggers? bcs the LDR i have a new serious plan with him. so dont be afraid to be in LDR, its fun and its teach us to earn positive thinks into better relationship
well im in office now and its time to go back, let me continue to speak about my work place :') .. really miss you blog :')

Oh my men!

DR TENMA

he is my new favorite character when i already read a comic tittled MONSTER. its gotta be the best comic ive ever READ. wanna know more? just read it! even its an old comic so you wont find the hard comic in everywhere now and it has a very long story in so much episodes but it will be worthed! the story is very twisted and sophisticated.

BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH

NEXT--> ive become a benedict cumberbitches since ive watching sherlock series in BBC. idk why it makes me realize that it was a REAL sherlock holmes character we've always hear and read when we're kids. And it wakes me up that sherlock holmes character by Rob*** was totally fooled us, see? well back to benedict, he was totally AWESOME. i like the way he talks, the way he twisted up our minds, he really acts like a Sexiest British Alive in that fucking  twisted series. i LOVE it

for me..

aktif itu menyenangkan. yang tidak menyenangkan itu setelahnya. karna sejatinya pasif seperti rumah, kemanapun, tubuh akan kembali pulang ke tempat dimana otak banyak berbicara.

nippon girl...

(flashback text)
long wiken!! waktunya ke makassar. tujuh jam berlalu sayapun tiba di rumah tante. cuaca dan lelah sangat mendukung tubuh ini bergegas naik ke lantai 2, kamar tidur kakak. belum sempat menutup mata seorang anak perempuan bermata sipit datang dengan langkah cepat dan terbatabata. fikirku hantu berkaki, karna tidak pernah melihatnya sama skali. dengan mata setengah tidurnya dia berkata "banyak sukali tdortdortdor!!". in a flash, saya menduga dia keluarga jauh penyandang autis. tidak lama kakak saya datang "this is my sister from majene". sembari menunduk, suaranyapun pecah melevel-upkan kekagetan "ooh oh haloo! saya nama ayumi dari japan"
since that, i knew her. she was a very cheerful and nice japanese girl, my cousin's exchange sister. we're closed. we have no blood-brotherhood but she assumed me as cousin too. too much story we've been through with my family. she is the most friendly girl i know. i think she could be an inspiration to everyone especially to every exchange-students. she was here during 2 years but she could speak Indonesia well with Makassar dialect. she loved indonesia so much

22 august she was back to visited Indonesia. 24 august she came to my house. it was suprising me when her voice busted woken me up from bed. she hug me tightly before she was talking too much about her experiences. she promised me to stay at my home at 27 august , so i just think she would come back.
but, God says another, 26 august 2013 she passed away in Makassar which she always said her "hometown". it was a really unbelievable news i ever heard :'(

mysterious pain

its fifth i feel like im dreaming. a few days ago someone check that there's a "creature" followed me from 4 years  ago. its a woman. he makes me look it in my hypnotic mind. it was vaguely but i could see, she was using veil, javanese blouse, and bun. i couldnt see her face. idk how it could be. totally unbelieveable -,- . he says in this condition the "creature" bring a half of my ruh went took walking to anywhere her place. it was.. crazy right? unfortunately when he checked me my hand was move by its own like a traditional dancer. i cannot even reallyreally imagine it happens x__x. okay its fucking non sense but real and now i just reallyreally want this creature gettin out from my body no matter how the way its out.

just share

Andai saja problematika itu berwujud, mungkin on the spot sudah menayangkanku memecahkan rekor penyakit hidrosepalus terparah seontor dunia. Tidak berwujud saja aku sudah merasa seperti melayang dibawa oleh sesuatu yang tak Nampak tapi sangat berat. Aku sebut ini dreaming feelling, entah sejak kapan aku mengalami ini. Yang ku tau hanya ini sangat mengganggu sistem usaha hidupku untuk menjadi lebih baik. Memperlambat gerak langkahku. Selalu ada redaman sesaat distiap gerak. Yang kulakukan hanyalah mencari halhal yang bisa kumasukkan ke dalam otakku. Mencari dan mencari. Dengan satu tujuan, ingin terkesan pintar. Mengetahui stidaknya sdikit dari beberapa hal menjadi pilihan tindakanku.  Aku ingin menghapus coretan gadis pasif dengan IQ rendah di atas papan namaku. aku memang bukan organisator atau seorang yang piawai dalam beretorika. Dan aku sadar  aku bukan orang yang punya cita-cita yang jelas atau satu mimpi yang tinggi. Aku hanya punya satu yaitu kepercayaan jika aku adalah satu dari sekian kecil orang yang BESAR di hari esok…

just share

good day some unlucky people all over the world. now, im gotta share about how funny was a ladies. the only one guy who makes it funny is radit.  he's my inspiration in all sadness. everything which its hardest could be funniest when i think the event is according to his stand up. actually, its about the last night event. when im crying too much made me ugliest looking in front of them. at the same time, i think radit's words is true, a ladies will ugliest looking of the time. maybe its a "that's why" he looked usual when we're broke up. perhaps he wont look or miss -ing for me anymore. and the "1 year 2 months" is useless.